Do You Love Yourself?
Some people appear naturally confident and happy with themselves - for most of us this isn't the case. Luckily, a healthy, positive sense of self can be developed. Like a muscle, the more you use it, the stronger it becomes.
1. ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR POSITIVES
It is important to become aware of our strengths and positive attributes, even if somewhat reluctantly at first. If you're struggling to think of any, come up with 3 answers for each of the following categories:
Things I'm good at...
Compliments I have received…
Times that my actions have made someone else smile...
Challenges I have overcome in life...
Write down your answers and review them regularly!
2. CUT BACK ON NEGATIVE SELF TALK
Negative self talk is hurtful and can reinforce unhelpful ideas about ourselves.
A good rule of thumb: Would I say it to a good friend in a situation like this? No? Then I won't say it to myself either. Yes? How would I say it?”
Try to re-word negative thoughts into less critical statements. It can be difficult to do at first, but it's important to build self-compassion.
3. COMPARE AND DESPAIR
Comparing ourselves to others wastes precious energy and we tend to compare ourselves in a negative way. Remember that you are a unique individual with your own personal strengths and weaknesses. Don't be afraid to be yourself.
If in doubt, pause, take a deep breath in, then let it out and say to yourself 5 times "I am enough!". Repeat as needed!